Don't allow other people to define you because you're trying to relate to them. It's great to learn from others and even to emulate those you admire and respect, but be your own person. What other people say and think about you isn't real. You determine your reality and the ability to decide who you are. Being held in high esteem by others is good, but not if you need to compromise your integrity or values to get there. Doing the right thing wont always be the popular choice but it will always be the best choice.